Rejection Hotline
by Sesshomaru'sgirl1
Summary: Bella is tired of Mike's advances on her, so she gives him the rejection hotline number. Funny. Bella and Edward OOC! FLUFF!


**A/n This is just a crazy one-shot I got when scrolling through my contacts. Yes, I have the rejection hotline in my phone. Also, the breakup hotline, and the psychiatric hotline.**

**Disclaimers: I do not own twilight or any of the hotlines, or the Blackberry storm, of the saying ' I 3 boys who sparkle'.**

_BPOV _

It was an ordinary day in the town of Forks, Washington… Oh, wait, it's not. It's sunny! It was rarely sunny in forks and these days were always my most dismal. Edward, my vampire boyfriend, couldn't be seen in the sun. He would sparkle. I was sitting in the parking lot of Forks high school, leaning on my truck. It was 8:25. 15 minutes 'til the bell rings. _Might as well go to first period, _I told myself, _get the day over with. _About halfway to English, I was stopped by none other than Mike Newton.

"Hey Bella!" He said. Mike was always happier when Edward wasn't around. "I was wondering," He continued without letting me answer. "If I have questions on the math homework, or if you want to go out sometime, or if I have questions about the English paper," I didn't miss the middle part. "Can I have your phone number?"

I sighed. Edward had insisted on getting me a cell phone to keep with me. Naturally I said no, but he had already gotten me one. A blackberry storm, to be exact. I couldn't deny after that. He must have seen the magazine on my bed. I was always looking at the ad for one. They were just so cool.

"Sure Mike," I said and pulled it out. He looked at me quizzically. "It's a new phone number," I explained, "Still haven't memorized it yet." He nodded at took out his phone. In my contacts – I only had 11 – I scrolled to the words **My Number**, but right after that one was one I had put in last night **Rejection Hotline**. Could I be this cruel? Yes, yes I could. I selected it and recited the number. "212-660-2245"(**A/N That is the real number haha!)** He entered it and saved it to Bella. I was tired of his advances on me. Couldn't he see I was with Edward?

"Thanks, do you want mine?" He asked.

"Nah, I've only given it to a few people. If I get a number I don't know I'll know it's you." I smiled. "Bye, I have to get to first hour." He smiled and walked off. This was going to be a long day.

_MPOV (MIKE)_

Yes! I had finally gotten the girl of my dreams to give me her phone number. The area code was kind of weird, but it's not my business where she gets her phone. Or should I say where Edward gets her phone, a nice phone at that. I mean, really? A blackberry storm? That was over the top. I hated that man. He ignores every person in this school, then when _my _Bella comes around he just has to take her.

_After School_

I drove home as quickly as I could, wanting to get finished with my homework. It wasn't that hard. When I was done I spent a half an hour mentally preparing myself. I had to be ready, so I wouldn't squeak like a banshee.

I found her in my contacts and spent another five minutes with my thumb hovering over the send button. When I got up my courage to hit the green button, I brought the phone up to my ear. On the second ring a robotic voice answered.

"Hello this is not the person you were trying to call, you've reached rejection hotline provided by the all new rejection and sponsored by the new March 9th Holiday, Get over it day. Seriously, it's really a new holiday. Check it out at . Anyway, the person that gave you this rejection hotline number did not want you to have their real number. We know this sucks, but don't be too devastated. So why were you given a rejection hotline number? Maybe you're just not this person's type (note this could mean boring, dumb, annoying, arrogant or just a general weirdo). Maybe you suffer from bad breath, body odor, or a nasty combination of the two. Maybe you just give off that creepy, overbearing, psycho stalker vibe. Maybe the idea of going out with you just seems as appealing as playing leap frog with unicorns. Regardless of the reason, please take the hint and accept the fact that you were rejected and then get over it; and please do your best to forget about the person who gave you this number because trust us, they've already forgotten about you. Thanks for calling the rejection hotline provided by " (**A/n that's really what it says!!)** I closed the phone, and sat on my bed. Did Bella reject me? No…

_EPOV_

I loved running, especially running back home to see my sweet Bella. All because of Alice, I was running extra fast. She had seen that vile Mike Newton asking my Bella out. Then, _she gave him her phone number._ At the city of Forks boundary limit, I stopped running to calm down. I really hoped she wasn't out with him right now. Who am I kidding she would never go out with him, she would never cheat. Eager to be with her I started running again.

Her scent was just as strong as always. Stepping into the front yard, I saw something move in her room, and heard the click of the door shutting. Perfect, I could surprise her. I scaled the side of the house and climbed through the window. She was shuffling around in the bathroom, having her 'human moment'. When the door reopened, my angel stepped through the threshold. Her hair was wet and she had on an extremely adorable set of pajamas. They were flece Hello Kitty pants with a homemade shirt that said 'I 3 Boys who sparkle'. I smiled as she attacked me.

"Edward! I thought you weren't coming home until tomorrow!" She practically yelled, and threw her arms around me. Reflexively I wrapped mine around her and held her flush against my body. "I missed you," she whispered.

"I missed you too," I told her. She had a way on doing that to me. "Alice had a vision." I looked at her knowingly. Her eyes turned guilty. "You gave Mike Newton your phone number." She smiled and started hysterically laughing. I was afraid there was something wrong with her. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah, I'm fine, but I didn't give him my number." She was trying to hold back a smile. "I gave him the rejection hotline number." She was laughing hard again, but this time I laughed with her. The rejection hotline was so funny, but there were many versions.

"Which number did you give him?" She leaned onto her bedside table to get her phone. The number was already logged into it. 212-660-2245. "Do you want to call it?" She nodded and hit send. The speaker was already on.

"Hello this is not the person you were trying to call, you've reached rejection hotline provided by the all new rejection and sponsored by the new March 9th Holiday, Get over it day. Seriously, it's really a new holiday. Check it out at . Anyway, the person that gave you this rejection hotline number did not want you to have their real number. We know this sucks, but don't be too devastated. So why were you given a rejection hotline number? Maybe you're just not this person's type (note this could mean boring, dumb, annoying, arrogant or just a general weirdo). Maybe you suffer from bad breath, body odor, or a nasty combination of the two. Maybe you just give off that creepy, overbearing, psycho stalker vibe. Maybe the idea of going out with you just seems as appealing as playing leap frog with unicorns. Regardless of the reason, please take the hint and accept the fact that you were rejected and then get over it; and please do your best to forget about the person who gave you this number because trust us, they've already forgotten about you. Thanks for calling the rejection hotline provided by " We broke out laughing again, and I fell off the bed. She followed and landed on top of me.

The phone had stopped speaking so I hung it up. Bella leaned down and kissed me, something I wasn't ready for. I kissed back, but was having trouble keeping in check. When she needed to breath I pulled away and gazed at her. "Can we go to your house?" She wanted to come to my house? Why? I silently asked her. "Charlie's at a gun show in Missoula, and I don't want to stay here all alone." She gave me the puppy dog eyes.

"Yeah, I think everyone there would love that." I flung her on my back and flew out the window. She kissed my neck and buried her face in my shoulder.

About halfway there she asked, "What about my clothes?" I hadn't thought of that.

"I'm sure Alice will have something." I was sure, "Oh, and I like the pajamas." She blushed. He shoulder and back heated up with her warmth. "I love your blush," I told her.

"You can't even see it." Her voice had a smile in it. She liked me giving her compliments, even if she didn't tell me so.

"Yes, but I can feel it," Her blush increased even more that time. "Did you make that shirt?" It was one of a kind, and I don't think anyone else would understand it.

"Yeah…" She smiled into my neck, "I didn't think you would ever see it." No?

"Oh! I see, you like to wear the cute pajamas when I'm gone… That's cool." She gasped.

"I didn't think you'd like them." She seemed embarrassed.

"I wouldn't like them?" She nodded into my neck. I stopped dead in my tracks and spun her around so she was facing me. "Isabella Swan," I began, "I love these pajamas. They make me love you even more." I was staring into her eyes. She tried to look down, but I grabbed her chin and kissed her with all of my might. I poured my everything into showing how much I loved her. Her hands grasped my hair and pulled me toward her, causing me to push her into a tree. I could feel her getting dizzy, so I let her go and buried my face in her hair, breathing in her delicious scent. We were both breathing hard, and I rested my forehead on hers, "Do you believe me?" She shook her head and pulled me closer. Again I kissed her, this time going a little further and opening my mouth with hers. Her hands fell limp, and I pulled away thinking that she had hyperventilated. Sure enough Bella was passed out in front of me. I was supporting her whole weight. Not wanting to wait here, I cradled her to my chest bridal style and ran the rest of the way to my house. I ran to my room and put her on my big bed I had gotten just for her. About five seconds after I got laid her down she awoke.

"Uhh, Edward?" She asked. I hugged her and gave her the _yes?_ look. "What happened?" She looked around. "Why is there a bed here?"

"Well, we were kissing and you hyperventilated, and I put this bed here for you. I didn't want you to have to sleep on the couch." I looked to my lone leather couch. It couldn't be comfy for her.

"We weren't _just_ kissing, and I don't need a bed here. The couch was fine." Her eyelids drooped and I knew she was extremely tired. It was 11:00PM.

"You're tired, Bella. We can talk about this in the morning." She reluctantly nodded after I started humming her lullaby. Tomorrow wouldn't be as easy.

**A/N I will expand this into the whole weekend, Bella gave Mike the # on Friday, so the whole weekend will be here!!! ******** I'm excited!!!!!**

**Click the green button please!**

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